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self love – Becky Heart
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self love Tag

The Prayer

When I was a little girl, I said a prayer. I asked earnestly to never forget what it feels like to be a kid. I don’t know exactly what my thought process was at the time. (I was quite young.) But there was something I saw in the grown-ups around me that I KNEW I didn’t want for myself. I remember knowing that it was VERY important to me. It is interesting to me that I was thinking that way at such an early age, but I’ve always remembered that one prayer. For the most part I believe the prayer was granted, because I seem to suck at “adulting”. No really. I identify so much easier and more quickly with children than I ever have with...

Leave It All On The Track

Not everyone knows this about me, but I LOVE TO DRIVE FAST! In high school, my friends called me Mario after experiencing my driving. Back then I was in a Toyota Celica hatchback, but I took it off-road sometimes, and pushed it to the limits in turns and everywhere else. I have fond memories of that car. I have learned over the years that the exhilaration I feel when driving a car fast is not one shared by everyone, let alone many women. When I drive, it is a game of skill and strategy. I am not just going “from point A to point B” as people love to say are the purpose of cars (yawn...

Reflections On Mothering A Daughter ~ A Mothers Day Post

The following is a poem I wrote on Mothers Day. I feel it needs explanation due to the feedback I received after sharing it on social media. It is NOT my current experience of life or my relationship with my daughter. It IS however from my own life learnings, and things I have observed over the course of time, in myself and in our connection as mother and daughter. I was reflecting on how we teach our children, especially girls, by way of modeling. The "do as I say, not as I do" philosophy never works. If we as women diminish ourselves, shrink in the face of adversity, use hateful language to describe ourselves, and fail to care for our needs and our dreams, our daughters will fall in...

Alone.

I stood alone on the beach watching the sunset. It was magnificent. Did I mention I was alone? I began to contemplate lonliness. I’ve felt severe lonliness before. I’ve been depressed. I’m sad almost daily, at least for a moment. Standing there on the beach I asked myself, “Am I lonely, or sad? What is this feeling?” It was different. It felt important somehow. I’ve been drawn to solitude a lot lately. I meditate. I pray. I ask for guidance and say thank yous for lists of things. I jot down ideas, and write things. Most times they are left “unfinished”. I forget to eat. I let people in and I go out, but then I go back to my little cocoon and sit still in the...

Lunch: Just Food? Or An Act of Profound Self Love?

I had the most wonderful lunch! I took myself to my favorite Thai restaurant. I ordered things from the menu that I’d never tried before. (I have certain go-to dishes ordinarily) I enjoyed soup and even dessert. I sipped jasmine tea and finished the whole pot. It’s like it was my birthday or some other special occasion. Only it wasn’t. No, this date with myself, as magical as it sounds, was what most would call a “Hail Mary”. Forgive me for sounding melodramatic, but this was a life or death situation. A literal Lunch To Save My Life. “Pre-Lunch” my whole body was buzzing with agitation. My pores have been seeping anger and frustration and I’ve only been about 2 steps ahead of the men in the little...

Crying: How It Sucks and Why I Highly Recommend It

I’ve stopped wearing mascara on my lower lashes. It’s become a necessity since I started crying. All. The. Time. Seriously though, there are days when I have put on makeup and DURING application, tears would come. I would clean up my face and continue to apply makeup only to walk out of the bathroom and begin crying again. The struggle is real, as they say. The reaction of most people when they hear I’ve been crying is “Oh my goodness. Are you okay?” or “What is wrong?” or some other words of concern. I SO SO SO appreciate these gestures of compassion and love. Some days they are like air to me as I’m gasping for breath. If you are one of these people, THANK YOU for seeing...